MKD 1
MKD-1, otherwise known as Operation Bob Dobbs, is the annual ZOMBOAPOC gear check that we run on the river.
What is Mountain Kit Days (MKD)? A Kit is a battle load out, it is your gear. MKD is basically a three day load out fun-test (five days total for prep crew) that helps you find out if your ZOMBOAPOC dream kit that you put together after playing Fallout or Days Gone really is practical for grid down life in the Appalachians. The AMPs are not a militia, however, we do understand the need to have our shit together for the worst of times. However, planning and training shouldn’t be fucking boot camp, it should be fun. Bring your load out for your truck, motorcycle and for the river raft – we’ll test it together and see what really works. Our environment is ‘tactically inclusive’, so we aren’t here to judge you or say mean words unless you point your loaded pecker in the wrong direction. The goal of the fun-test is to learn what works best for you, discuss practical scenarios and modify our load-outs based on the experience.
Also, we stuck a survival cache full of booze, beer (cold) and fun stuff in the woods … the only hint is that it’s somewhere on the river.
MKD-1 BOB DOBBs is the first of it’s kind, but true to mission, Appalachian Mountain Pirate gathering of the Captains, First Mates and the Crews. This year, it will sub as the June 3 rd conclave and it will also feature the classic overnight at Mountain Island. We will float the Bell with our full gear, so expect to get wet. MKD-1 is a gear test that should be a fun-test.
Again, the purpose of MKD-1 is to test your shit. The only standard here really is you. While we will be here for you on that weekend, we will most likely not be there for your fight when the balloon goes up. MKD-1 is designed to give you the experience, confidence and readiness level you need for that day. Also, it gives everyone a chance to be together as our Founder intended (Captain Ed, Rum Be Upon Hum). Daytime is train time, so save the politics and other bullshit for the nighttime when we ar e all drinking. Usually that is funnier anyway. Mountain Pirates are a very diverse group, so do not assume everyone hates Trump or Biden as much as you do … (hell we usually hate all politicians.)
Question: Who the fuck is Bob Dobbs?
Answer: Glad you asked! Rev. Bob is, well, everything! In this case, it stands for Bring only the Best for the Day of the Big Balloon … however to others he is : J.R. “Bob” Dobbs is or was the founder of the Church of the SubGenius, holding the titles of High Epopt and Living Slack Master, and is the greatest Texas salesman the world has ever known. He has a grin and smokes frop in his pipe, is a full-blooded Yeti, is famous for his slogans, and has more Slack than any other SubGenius. His face is the basis of the iconic Dobbshead as well as the Dobbs Ikon.
Question: This seems fucking weird, what the hell does a glorified raft trip have to do with a door-to-door salesman from Houston, Texas? This is fucking weird!
Answer: We are weird …
Question: So this is just a raft trip?
Answer: Yes, a raft trip with alot of alcohol.
Question: What kind of alcohol?
Answer: Something special we call ‘MoonRum’, it has two ingredients … bet you can’t figure out which ‘two’.
Question: Aren’t you guys worried about law enforcement?
Answer: Only when they steer the boat wrong or produce a negligent discharge, then we are all swimming.
Question: Oh
Answer: That is not a question, but exactly …
Question: But what about commercial raft guides, normies or muggles? Aren’t you worried if they call the N.O.C.?
Answer: FTITCTAJ
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